


Bend in the River Mnemosyne

by Marie_L



Category: Almost Human
Genre: Angst, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Robot/Human Relationships, Sadness, annnnnggggst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-28
Updated: 2014-05-28
Packaged: 2018-01-26 21:58:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1704002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marie_L/pseuds/Marie_L
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Detective Paul mourns the death of an old partner, and turns to the only other DRN he knows for solace.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Danny

**Author's Note:**

  * For [flippingthevan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/flippingthevan/gifts).



> 'Cause I wholeheartedly agree with flip that that OTP is not the only story worth telling.

 

It was only two thirty in the afternoon when Detective Richard Paul received the quiet notification that Danny's body had been sold for scrap. He immediately dropped his MX at the station to busy himself with paperwork, and dragged his own beat-up self to a dingy bar near his apartment to get massively, self-pityingly plastered. Not McQuaids; he didn't want anyone to know who he was mourning for. For his first drink Paul raised a glass of 2028 Johnnie Walker in tribute to his fallen partner, although Danny himself would have rolled his eyes at the meaningless grand gesture.

It was his fault Danny was dead, and it wasn't. It was the spineless Police Bureau's, it was the scheming politicians, it was society's, it was the DRNs' own fault for being unstable, for being so fucking human. Mostly Paul blamed himself, though, as the most convenient target. He was one of the ones that had laughed at all the barbs at how crazy the DRNs were, and stood by while pressure mounted to replace them with a more emotionless unit. No one really believed the Bureau would spend a hundred million credits on sentient androids, another five administering the horrific Lugar tests to screen out the hopeless ones, then piss it all away and start from scratch. No one believed until the day they were all sent to sleep for recharging, and never again allowed to wake up.

Danny had been Richard's friend, and confidant, and -- it was still unthinkable to say it out loud even three years later -- lover. Danny had been there to pick up the sopping mess that was Richard Paul after his marriage to Cathy disintegrated, and turned him back into a functioning human being. Danny was the one who would patiently listen as long as it took, without a trace of judgment, night after night of emotional hemorrhaging that Richard couldn't express to another living soul. He had supernatural sense of when to be quiet and when to take action, when to be there as a sounding board and when to force Richard's hand for his own good.

_Why the fuck did you do that? --_

_\-- Because you needed it. Do you want to do it again?_

There was something about the DRNs that elicited the utmost trust. Or maybe it was just Richard's DRN. When the android had first been assigned, Paul didn't know what to think about this supposedly disposable thing that clearly had a mind of its own. Danny regarded his role as human protector with the utmost seriousness, putting his whole being into making himself Richard's perfect partner and extending to areas of his life the bot had no business nosing into. At least that's what Richard thought at first. But after weeks of boring stakeouts and forced intimacy with a person who would give everything and ask for nothing in return, Richard began to rely on his support more and more. He didn't even see it coming.

_Did I ever tell you the exact moment I knew it was over with Cathy? --_

_\-- Tell me everything._

The first time Danny kissed him, it wasn't in the cruiser or on any official police business. It was back at his lonely studio, after "celebrating" his newly finalized divorced papers. Richard wasn't particularly drunk at the time,  merely  devastated in a way that only people with shattered lives can comprehend . Danny unobtrusively sat the entire night while Richard's other friends tried to cheer him up, nursing a drink he wouldn't actually consume, listening, watching , not saying one facile word. He made sure Richard made it home, and Richard -- exhausted, drained -- rather brusquely dismissed him for the night. He stared at Richard with those luminous eyes, then cupped his chin and kissed him. Tenderly,  leisurely , the most sensuous kiss Richard had ever experienced, as if to drain him of the pestilence of pain and replace it with sweetness and devotion.

_You can go faster, you know. Jesus, you are a worse cock tease than a virginal prom date.--_

_\-- I know. No. I want every square inch of your body to hum with pleasure before I let you come._

They didn't even do much that night, just kissed and stripped their clothes and caressed for what felt like hours. Richard had never known such  cherished intimacy with a man like that, or someone who at least looked like a man. He didn't  _act_ like a guy though, or a woman either. It was  lovemaking with someone whose sole purpose in life was to bring out the goodness in  his body and soul, heal  him , elevate  him without worshipful fawning or  self-abrogation.

_Do I belong to you, or do you belong to me? --_

_\-- Both. Both. Do that again. Please._

It took Richard quite a while to learn what Danny wanted, or even simply liked. The DRN had been attentively observing him for weeks, plus the cheater had physiological scanners to boot. Naturally this translated into a rapidly-advancing ability to play Richard's body like a virtuoso on a musical instrument. Richard was at a distinct disadvantage in the learning process, but made the conscious decision to make up for it with enthusiasm. It was a matter of fairness,  to give what you get,  and Paul prided himself on his sense of justice. And he did learn, slowly, what makes an android squirm.

_You can do it. Focus, you infuriating bot. Listen to my voice and focus.--_

_\-- I'm done, Richard. I can't take any more. End this. Just let them kill me._

_No. Stop saying that. Be your normal stubborn stoic ass. Focus. --_

A few weeks later they began administering the infamous Lugar tests. The vilest images humanity could muster were streamed into the consciousness of the DRNs, and they were left to fester with the memories for a week to see who would break or turn psychopathic before mercifully wiping it all. Danny barely passed. The child rape camps of Mozambique nearly did him in. It was the one time Danny really needed him and Richard was able to step up to the plate. After it was over and the experience purged from his neural net, Richard took him home and gently made love to him all the way to sunrise, without ever telling him why.

The other time Danny needed him, there was nothing to be done but rage against the cold bureaucracy. His mediocre Lugar scores were enough to save his life at the time, but not good enough to be among the select few retained in Bureau storage. For some cruel reason officers weren't allowed to buy their own partners during the mass sell-off. Security, they said. There was a fear, completely legitimate, that commissioned cops would take advantage of their position to steal back their android's memories. A few people resigned in desperation, but still were thwarted in acquiring their loved ones. The old minds were permanently erased, murdered, and newborn blank androids scattered to the wind. DRN-346, no longer Danny, was sold to a copper conglomerate and put to work as a drone supervisor in the mines, a job requiring high intelligence and even higher risk tolerance.

At the absurdly early dinner hour on the day Danny's neural net was crushed by rockfall, Richard had enough of memories that he alone now possessed. He staggered up to his apartment and collapsed into merciful unconsciousness on his bed.

Only later, when he woke at one am hung over but unable to sleep, did he think of Dorian.

 

 


	2. Dorian

 Richard tried to let it go, but once the idea occurred to him to go see Dorian he couldn't get it out of his mind. He knew it was irrational. He knew Danny was dead and Dorian was not a fucking carbon copy, no matter what he looked like. But in Richard's grief-addled mind it was an irresistible draw. He just wanted to see that face again, hear his voice. Once Dorian opened his mouth it would be obvious how different he was, and enough would be enough.

Truthfully he hadn't treated Dorian very well, when he wasn't ignoring his existence. Richard told himself it was because Kennex was an asshole and the two of them were basically joined at the hip, but he knew the problem ran deeper. Secretly he raged at both of them for having what was unfairly snatched away from him. Dorian's personality wasn't the same as Danny's; he was snarkier, openly emoted more, and was prone to breaking out into song, if the rumors were true. But the bot's unfailing psychological support of the half-broken Kennex so strongly reminded him of his lost love that he could hardly stand to look at either one of them. Why did Kennex, who murdered his own android partner and fucking _shot_ Richard's right in front of him, get to have a DRN back, when all the professional grovelling in the world wouldn't let him keep his Danny? What made either one of them so damned special?

Richard took a taxi over to Rudy Lom's lab, feeling like a fool, especially if Lom himself answered the door. It was distinctly possible Dorian would be recharging and unconscious at that hour. But no, he appeared at the lab's entrance, looking quite surprised.

"Detective Paul. Rudy is asleep. Is it an emergency? Should I wake him up?"

"No. I just want to talk to you, if you don't mind. Can I come in?"

Dorian's face flashed blue as he analyzed the unusual situation, but bade him in. "What can I help you with, Detective Paul?"

His voice. That soft, slightly feminine voice. It was almost irresistible not to fall on the soft lips that went with it. Richard suddenly felt woozy, and rocked on his feet. Dorian reached out an steadied him. Scanned him, Richard was sure.

"Your blood alcohol level is at 0.11 percent and your hepatic acetylcholine levels are elevated, indicating several hours of drinking," Dorian rattled off. "Why don't you sit down?" He dragged him to a small dumpy sofa shoved into a corner of the huge old cathedral, concerned about the detective's aberrant behavior.

"I'll be fine, Dorian. Back to my old grumpy self by morning." Dorian was sitting so close to him, Richard couldn't resist reaching out and, with the lightest possible touch, running his fingers straight down the crackling cheek matrix. Dorian closed his eyes at the sudden stimulation, trying to inhale it all in. No one had done that to him before, Richard was sure. That Dorian could remember, that is.

"Um ... that felt ... are you sure you're all right?"

"No. Someone died today." At his widening alarmed eyes, he added, "Don't worry, no one you know." Probably a lie, and also the truth.

"A loved one?"

"Yes. Very much."

"I'm sorry to hear that, Detective. But you wanted _me_ to help you?"

This wasn't helping. His eager seriousness to assist him was too much like Danny. It was still like a bleeding open wound, reminding him of what he had lost. Plus Dorian was sure to report the strange encounter with Kennex, thus earning him unending shit at the station. "Dorian, can you promise to keep this between you and me?"

"Of course, if that's what you wan .." As soon as the oath was extracted, Richard leaned forward and kissed him. On impulse mostly, he wasn't really thinking with the forebrain most of the day. Dorian was too shocked to pull away or do much, but with some mild encouragement with his lips Richard was able to coax a response. It was like the very beginning with Danny, when neither one of them knew what they were doing, and there was plenty of fumbling and guessing on both sides. But the DRNs were nothing if not fast learners, and Paul was in no way a neophyte now. Also their curiosity tended to get them, if nothing else.

He tasted like Danny, an excessively salty metallic taste, and smelled like him too. Polymers and more salt. It was overwhelming, the reminders, and he had to take break to absorb it, leaning his forehead on Dorian's while he clutched his head and neck.

"Which one was he?" Dorian whispered, his eyes still closed, reveling in all the sensation.

"346," choked out Richard. "I ... I named him Danny. They wouldn't let me keep him, and now he's dead for a second time."

"I'm not him, you know."

"I know, I do know. I just want ..." He sucked on Dorian's neck, since it was so close, then blew lightly on the saliva and watched his face flash red. He always loved that reaction. "I want to make the pain go away, for just a little bit."

"If we continue, you'll feel better by tomorrow? Not sorry or ashamed?" Dorian framed the question entirely around Richard's needs, even though the android's professional position was much more precarious. The self-sacrifice, exactly how Danny would have phrased it. Richard put his hands on Dorian's shoulders in mock exasperation.

"Dorian. I promise to treat you with exactly the same level of dickishness tomorrow as yesterday. I'm a big boy, I will not pine away like a schoolgirl or get all weird. Okay?"

Dorian was on the verge of giving in to his curiosity, Richard could tell, but his face revealed the lingering doubts. Insecurities. That was a difference between them. "I don't know what to do ..." Richard cut him off again with another sensuous kiss, even longer this time, and this time Dorian did respond right away. He was improving fast already.

"Gotta learn when to shut up, bot. Have scanners, will use them. We men are simple creatures. Kiss a lot, touch a lot, learn how to give a decent hand job and blow job, ninety percent of your work is done. Do you want to learn or not? I'm sure there's someone you can spring your new found skills on, sooner or later."

He smiled at that little speech and Richard smiled back, not caring how ridiculous he probably looked, how unprofessional this entire situation was, or what the fuck he would say if Rudy Lom got insomnia and came downstairs. It felt good, all this touching, comforting and familiar and arousing. It had been so long since he had felt this good. Just one beautiful night, then he'd let Dorian go back to whatever thing or non-thing he had with Kennex. Richard knew he was not the one Dorian was ultimately attached to.

They languidly removed their clothes then, Richard using every feather-light touch he knew to turn the android into a quivering needy mess. The best thing about robots, in Paul's estimation, was that they have no sexual hang-ups on inhibitions when it comes down to it. No fear or guilt or shame about their bodies, merely concern for their partner and endless inquisitiveness. It was strange being the experienced one, but exhilarating too, for this time Richard was the one who gave everything and expected nothing in return. In his position, it was exactly what Danny would have done.

 

******

 

A week later Dorian cornered him at his desk, Kennex not in sight. As promised Richard had treated him exactly the same as before, only it wasn't the same. The tension, the aggravation Richard had for Dorian was gone, although the DRN was probably the only one to notice it. He handed Richard a small rectangular box. "Here. I used Rudy's name to acquire this. I thought you could keep it safe."

The gift was a six-inch cylinder imbedded with swirling green energy, a tiny ID for DRN-346 stamped on one end. The small processing core containing the mysterious Synthetic Soul. Richard touched Dorian's hand in wordless thanks, stricken, not caring who saw at that moment.

"I know you can never bring back what you had. But maybe someday, in a time better than now, you can give him a new life."


End file.
